Lilies... Where it all began (for me)

I'm back from the Lilies War. This year, Tosten and I worked hard not to leave the site. So coming home this year, I actually had culture shock. I'm having a hard time adjusting focusing on minutia- I had a kind of melee-mind going the whole war. When I got home, I tried to get the laser-focus on tasks and organization that I usually have and found I was still using my wide-peripheral vision. Wierd.

I'm happy about fighting again. Thanks go to Lilies War, the Calontir army, and Lars. The Calontir army welcomes every fighter, no matter the skill level. Every soldier is wanted. Lilies is where I saw the forties-something women taking up the sword for the first time. Seeing them not only still fighting, but now excelling is an inspiration. Lars, I can't thank you enough. You always know how to gently give me the kick in the pants I need. He never gives up on me, even when I give up on myself.

Sunday at home we watched some video from the 2005 Known World Rattan Symposium. Way too many pearls of wisdom to glean in just one sitting! One thing that grabbed me was Earl Sean Kirkpatrick Tarragon of Artemisia: "Your worst opponent is your ego". Ouch.

So what are my goals? I decided that my 1 year goal is to get all my authorizations: Spear, polearm, two weapon, combat archery, seige. The spear being the biggest imperative.

How was the fighting? Monday, the first day of fighting began with the ten-man team melees. The Sot camp/Northshielders brought 14 fighters to the field, so I offered to be an alternate. On the third round, I stepped in, and kicked butt. I killed two cleanly at the end of the bout. I was definitely in "Hoo-Yah! mode (add muscle man pose).

That day, the Northshield team was not so happy. Their first bout a young female fighter fell and was stepped on by our team, resulting in a broken collarbone. Unfortunately, the MIC stomped over to the team, asking "Who is the leader of these thugs?" Unfortunately this set the tone for the rest of the day.

Thursday, in the Castle scenario, I followed my Baron Rodrigo into a room to overtake the flag. Rodrigo dispatched the flag bearer, while I fought a knight. In the tussle, I was briefly pinned to the wall. The knight tapped me on one side of my helm, and as I freed my sword, tapped the other side. I shook my head, and then swung solidly into his own helmet. As I was swinging, I noticed he hadn't raised his weapon at all. After my blow, he indignantly yelled, "I killed you twice!" I angrily replied, "That was a kill?" and we both stomped off to our respective resurrection points.

I retreated to my team on the sidelines, whining "Tristan..." and told the viscount my tale of woe. He wisely suggested I speak to the knight, mentioning the said knight was once Society Earl marshal. Great, I thought, I'm really screwed. I began with hung-god look, and took the stance that I was wrong to not take his blows. I don't believe he even remembered the incident, his response was something to the effect of "We don't want people getting bruised...".

This discussion didn't make me feel better, actually I felt worse. If he had at least put a little oomph into the second tap, I might have paid attention. He could have knocked my head from my shoulders, but I felt really insulted by the taps.

Maybe I'm getting "little guy" syndrome mixed up with "girls can't hit hard enough". I was still stinging from a recent melee practice where I put everything I had into a clean greatsword down the center of helm. His head rocked! The fighter walked right through me. Now, this fighter is a squire of Knight who plays a HARD game, and wont take blows unless they hurt him.

This is all giving me mixed messages. One- I'm not hitting hard enough, the other, I'm not taking blows. Yeah, I know, I know, I need to just get comfortable with my own skill and then brush off the rest. I don't want to be separated from the guys. On the field, I want to be just another fighter, not a "chick with a stick".

Upside- The Howling Yeti made Tosten and I part of the company. I am so honored! I know that I'm not YET a real asset to the team, but their faith is inspiring me to become the soldier that they need. (Insert Yeti howl here.)