Patience and Perspective

Sunday I spent another day training with Sir Tristan. I thought I needed to work on throwing combo shots, but minute or two sparring showed my real deficit: defense.

We worked on defining lethal range and resting outside of range. We drilled on moving quickly out of range, and then quickly into range again. I like to park my heels, and Tristan kept me moving. Lastly, we worked on shield movement. My shield really tired my arm, so switching shields really helped.

I drove home, my arm muscles burning, and my brain working hard re-play and imprint what I had learned. My mind started to evaluate the huge gap between myself and Sir Tristan (which I know is a ridiculous comparison!) then comparing myself to other newbie fighters. The euphoria I was feeling melted away, replaced with frustration. Hadn't I watched brand new fighters suit up and authorize? Guys who jumped right in and swang killing blows? What was taking me so long? Little nagging doubts started creeping in.

I know that I have this faulty critic in my mind, so I shot off an email the next day to Sir Tristan, to evaluate how I was really doing. He would tell me plainly how it really was, and hopefully find some promise in what I was doing right.

His response knocked me harder than any sound blow. Fighting is a path, not a goal, he said. Are you having fun? Then keep doing it. If not, keep trying to find what you do like.

This was exactly the whack I needed to knock me back onto the path. The answer was so right, it made me feel foolish. I never underestimated Tristan's prowess and knowledge, but I did underestimate his wisdom.

"When the student is ready, the teacher appears."